The thing I've realized about this coming of age saga is that it really is as if a switch was turned on, starting Monday. It's the week where Mommy Can Do No Right. A kiss has been enough to set off a litany of wrongs perpetrated unto her, beginning with, "MY HEAD MOMMY! NO TOUCH MY HEAD!! NO KISS MY HEAD!!!! MINE!!!!"and culminating in, "BWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!"
This, of course, will set the tone for the remainder of the day.
It's also tough to watch. It's hard to see your child losing her mind and inevitably, we can see when things have gotten to the point of no return - that stage of the tantrum wherein the child has forgotten what they were mad about and is now just mad because they're mad and they don't know why they're mad so now they're scared and mad which scares them more...
You can see where that's going - and seasoned parents, you can please stop pointing and laughing at me now. Really.
We try to rationalize it anyway. She's mad at me because I've been TDY a lot lately and this started after I returned from drill. She's in a growth
spurt and her hormones are raging. She's teething (molars, no less) and it's making her super-cranky and prone to fits. She's picking up on the parental stress going on due to aforementioned job issues.
It's probably a little of all of that - and a lot of: She's Two.
Here's the kick in the arse: Her teachers at Play Skool say that she's been a perfect angel all week. That they've actually never seen a tantrum out of her. [facepalm]
This, too, shall pass. We know that. I worry about my TDY next week though and that these back-to-back-to-back trips will wear both A and M out even more and make it worse.
Wish us luck.
How did you weather the tantrum storms of toddlerhood?
3 comments:
You're missing a reaction: Sorry to hear that, how can I help?
I don't know if there's anything I can do but listen, or take a walk with you or just be around for you, but please give a shout if there's any way I can relieve even the slightest bit of pressure for you.
HUGS! L.
I think that was when my short-term memory started to go . . . or something like that.
Seriously, one thing that helps is to appreciate the way a child thinks - specifically, how quickly she "forgets" the bad and moves eagerly into happier things. That's what moms need to do, too. Yes, make sure learning occurs, but move on as soon as you can. Certainly don't try to make sense of these behaviors - they are indeed hormone-influenced and similar to pre-teen illogic. Another tactic is to think about how funny this would be in a sit-com, LOL. Actually, that's how I've lived through a lot of adult stresses . . . .
In terms of learning, I have found it is more effective to tell the child what you expect "before" behavioral triggers arise. Such as, we're going into the store and you need to ___. Remember last time you ___ and got in trouble and we had to leave right away? Do you want that to happen? No? Good, neither do I, so let's follow the rules." - SKL
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